Archives for the month of: May, 2010

so I’ve seen these around on the internet before, and I never really got what the deal was. so I finally decided to go to the damn site and check it out. I just about busted a gut from laughing. here’s some of my favorites (there are other animals available, insanity wolf is the best jsyk):

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I won’t be posting anything today, because I’ll be too busy laughing at the kendra wilkinson sex tape. oh, and I’ve nothing worth blogging.

have a gif of justin bieber getting pwned by a revolving door. not the actual video. just the gif. I’m lazy, remember?!

I’m not even gonna bother exerting myself trying to be witty and funny. this is my umpteenth post today and the picture speaks for itself.

cock goes where?

“The more well-endowed goat took a liking to the other one and I swear it was traumatic. There was a lot of crying and goat noises and I felt incredibly guilty and I didn’t know what to do. I had homosexual goats… so I sent them off to Sonoma” – adrien brody

if I had a farm, undoubtedly, I’d love my gay kids just as much as my hetero ones. just sayin’.
I wonder, how long before peta and glaad do a cross over promo for gay animal rights?

there’s this dude I know, mayo. despite our relationship consisting of not being friends, humping mudkips, mild verbal abuse, arguing about the neccessity of ampersands, and innuendos about oral sex, we get along well enough for him to link me some pretty cool stuff sometimes. I now share with you what has been shared with me. seriously. click the damn links. or I’ll send my llama after you.

5). church drum and bass rave. lol, church goers. lol.
glow sticks are optional

4). deadmau5, strobe. beautiful, dreamy, lovely. le sigh.

3). hot chip, I feel better. the song is smooth and the video is wtf. two of my favorite things. youtube is fucking lame and won’t let me imbed. fuck you, youtube.
I feel better

2). the xx, shelter. for the sake of continuity, I’m not embedding these either. there’s nothing else to say besides: the xx <333456789
shelter (death to the throne remix)

1). dance floor dale. this one gets major points for being directed by one half of the tim & eric duo. also, for explicit sex scenes.
dance floor dale

warning, depending on your level of animosity towards twilight, the following video might not safe for life.

I’ve done my best to avoid all things twilight. I can’t even participate in anything twilight for the sake of good old fashioned hipsteresque irony, because everything about the franchise is cringe worthy. unfortunately, twatlight has a way of occasionally creeping in through that sliding door I never lock, donkey punching me, and dragging my soul down into the firey pits of screaming fan girl hell. now all I can think about is, “does their jizz sparkle too?”

reading harry potter and… fuck, I can’t even remember the full name anymore… reading the seventh harry potter book for the one and only time was, for me, 9 hours of bawling my eyes out and silently cursing j.k. rowling for killing all my favorite characters. but the thing I really, really, REALLY disliked about harry potter and the extended camping trip was that damned half assed, full of fail, barely ten page long epilogue.

if you’re gonna do an epilogue, especially after a decently solid ending to a novel, don’t call that shit in on your iphone while getting a pedicure in the bahamas from a banana hammock clad cabana boy, alright? I would have much rather been able to think up my own happily ever after for the potter brats, instead of having it watered down and spoon fed to me.

that being said, what is sure to be a movie I will fight claw and tooth refusing to see before being dragged to the theatre by my mother, and ultimately omg loving it, is currently filming the worst epilogue in the history of film.

late 30's =/= to middle age

being in your late 30’s is NOT equal to being 50. I don’t care how many avada kedavra spells the kid wonder has dodged, no one that age looks that old unless they’ve been gargling with scotch and snorting coke off a squib’s ass for 15 years straight. SAUCE

if you’re one of the few people who aren’t into the ‘lost’ hullabaloo, and wonder what you’ve missed out on, here’s all your questions answered in under two minutes, by cats:

it’s too soon for me to collect my thoughts about the finale, but who else was jearing up all over the place?

I’d never heard or seen an insane clown posse song or video before, and I never want to again, because I’m afraid it will never, ever, ever, never, live up to my expectations set by this:

it’s so beautiful it hurts.

here’s a really cool site full of various little text adventures